How is my timing on Anxiety? I thought I would pay it forward and help others with my thoughts on anxiety. I thought that since I was familiar with stress, but not really crippled by anxiety, I could help others adjust their paths through stressful moments and avoid the conversion to anxiety.

Slow down. I am not diagnosing everyone and I am aware that everyone is different in dealing with stress. However, there are also a ton of people that if they knew they weren’t alone. If they knew others struggled in the same ways. If they had a sense of belonging… would not be consumed in anxiety. They would be able to pick up their eyes and see a more clear path.

Well, last week I pulled a couple of all-nighters on a few time-sensitive projects. I worked myself right into a case of Shingles. Ugh. While I may not be popping big pharma’s pills, I would say the shingles are a manifestation of stress at a higher than acceptable level.

This morning, in my quiet time, I am sitting pre-sunrise and hear sirens coming. They are getting closer and closer. Soon, my home office is resplendent with flashing lights breaking the darkness. I see the ambulance pull out a gurney for my neighbor… and I feel my heart start to break.

My mind starts to race. If its the husband, I can see it. He is getting older and keeps hurting himself lately working on things around the house. If its his wife, I immediately think how heart-broken the hubby will be. We just moved into this neighborhood over the last 2 months. I barely know these people, but I am invested.

I pull myself away from the window. It’s not my business – I tell myself. I pray with my wife for them and head back to the office. The lights fade away and the neighborhood – now awake in the sunshine is once again quiet.

My heart is heavy – my shingles hurt like the dickens – and I think I am going to give you… the reader, words of wisdom about stress and anxiety.

Do Life Together

You Bet! Here is a thing that has bothered me a ton over my years. Why don’t we do life together? I have moved all over the country and worked to stay in touch with many people. It starts with phone calls, virtual video calls, emails… then scales down to texts and occasional shared Tik Tik or Instagram Post.

This is not doing life together.

Humans are a tribal species. While we can adjust to solitude and can at times find it comforting, we are designed to be interwoven into the community. The idea that we do life alone, that we even as “Anchorites” feel justified in our stoic stance… is wrong.

Not only are we able to offer light and life to others, but the energy we share with others offers light and life to ourselves. Are people a pain in the ass? Yep. Are people a blessing? Yep. Learn to be kind.

When Were the Best of Times

If you think back to your best moments. If you really dive deep within yourself, I bet you might see a moment in time when you accomplished something on your own that made you feel awesome in the moment. However, I bet there are also times that you remember a group laugh. You remember a somber moment emboldened by the love of others.

I want to encourage you that those days of being surrounded by loved ones does not have to over. When we say the good ‘ol days, and lean to an understanding that we cannot reconstruct those days… we are wrong. We may not be able to reconstruct .77 a gallon for gas, or a loaf of bread for Eighty-five cents… but we can step out of our comfort zone and increase our tough points within society.

When we were in school. Many of us had 20-30 classmates. Depending on the school, we may have had 200 – 1200 school mates. This on top of Scouts, Sports and Church gave up the opportunity to grow our personal circles.

As we get older, our circles shrink. While I agree that real-friends might only get counted on one hand, the idea that we restrict ourselves to one hand of friends is silly.

How to be Together

If you are in business, it is simple. Connect. Go to LinkedIn and connect to as many other business owners in your area. Then watch their posts and look for events in your area that you can attend – meeting your new internet friends in person.

You can join the Chamber of Commerce for your area. If you provide a service for other businesses, reach out to your local City Hall and Community College. Offer to speak or attend a business start up event. You have something to offer, and that act of offering will create connection.

Not a business? No sweat. Get active. Ride a bike and find out when the bike shop has a local ride event. When do groups host 5k walks? Are you a believer? Where is your church? If you attend a church already, where is your Small Group? I beg you… connect.

Togetherness Vs Anxiety

When we shelter ourselves and believe we are taking care of ourselves by not exposing our vulnerable selves… we amplify the anxiety. We begin to think its us. We think we are worse than others or worse off than others. The negativity stacks and we feel trapped.

When we do life together… we realize it is not just us. Everyone has a struggle. Further, we can recognize that our strengths and weaknesses line up with others in a Lego-brick way. We fit together to take up the weaknesses for each other and strive forward as a “Tribe” instead of a lonesome entity.

If you read this and are at the beginning of this reconnection journey, you can start with my LinkedIn. Send the connection request and put “Do Life Together” in the top.